March 4, 2022
Living in a shared flat is the trend these days. Students and young professionals cannot afford to rent a flat on their own, plus they are more migrant, not wanting a long-term lease until they find the job they want to stay on. And students are usually short term, and not all want the dormitory experience, desiring a home that feels like a home sweet home, and not a hospital.
Community living is difficult, even amongst family members. So imagine people from different countries, different languages, different cultures, different ages, different sexes, all coming together under one roof? This is the trend of the 2020s, that is sharing homes with strangers. It gives a unique experience, and from the social-cultural aspect, a big science experiment! Now imagine being in a foreign country, not knowing anyone, the language, the ways of being, and sharing a house with those people, can be stressful and can lead to moments of despair. Especially if it is your first time living on your own!
Not all of us have the same cleanliness, same hygiene, same beliefs, same mindset, and so on. So how do you share the kitchen, the toilet, the shower, the refrigerator with these total strangers? Not everyone is nice and understanding. Sometimes there is mis-communication, because if everyone is speaking English, it is their 2nd language, so words can lead to confusion.
Well, as your landlord, I (Greg), have seen and heard a lot of situations amongst the tenants. How does Greg deal with it? Firstly, his advice is for everyone to try and communicate on their own, to try resolving the problems. Not always this works. Then sometimes, they will ask for my help or intervention. But I avoid intervening as much as possible, because it is my view that you, the tenant, a young adult, has to try on your own to resolve conflicts of interest. That’s how we grow as people and part of the experience of living abroad, is to gain this experience under our belt. Another reason I avoid interfering is because I don’t want to take sides. I have to remain impartial, because you are all my tenants and clients. So I also have to do a juggling act which is not always easy.
There have been households where everyone really got along, even them all going away for a weekend, or hanging out together at dinners, going out with friends, just getting along amusingly and friendly. These are the best situations as a landlord we could have, seeing everyone happy and getting along.
Therefore, the
House Rules, Information and Code of Conduct
are so important. They exist for a reason. It is given to all tenants at the beginning of their stay. Each tenant is asked to completely read the document and agree, just like when signing something from Google, you have to accept the terms. Knowing these rules will avoid conflicts. Avoiding discord will make your experience more enjoyable and memorable. And that is what we all want :)
Why Living With the Landlord Isn’t Always the Best Idea When Renting a Room
Renting a room in someone’s home can seem like a practical, budget‑friendly solution—especially in competitive housing markets. On paper, it offers lower rent, fewer upfront costs, and a more “homey” environment. But once you look beyond the surface, sharing a living space with the landlord often comes with complications that many renters don’t anticipate. What feels like a simple arrangement can quickly turn into a situation where boundaries blur, privacy shrinks, and the power dynamic becomes uncomfortably one‑sided.
Below are some of the most common reasons why living with the landlord may not be the ideal setup.
1. Your Privacy Is Limited by Default
Even with the most respectful landlord, you’re still living in their home. That means:
They may feel entitled to know where you are, what you’re doing, or who you bring over.
You might feel watched or judged simply because they’re always around.
Everyday activities—cooking, relaxing, having guests—can feel monitored.
Privacy is one of the biggest sacrifices in this arrangement, and it’s often underestimated until you’re already living there.
2. The Power Dynamic Is Unequal
When your landlord is also your housemate, the balance of power is inherently skewed:
They set the rules, and you’re expected to follow them.
They may enforce “house norms” that aren’t written in the rental agreement.
Disagreements can feel risky because they control your housing.
This imbalance can make it difficult to advocate for yourself, request repairs, or negotiate anything without worrying about jeopardizing your living situation.
3. Boundaries Can Be Blurry or Inconsistent
In a typical rental, the relationship is clear: you’re the tenant, they’re the landlord. But when you share a home:
The line between “tenant” and “guest” can get fuzzy.
Landlords may treat the arrangement casually—until it suits them not to.
You may be expected to adapt to their lifestyle, routines, or preferences.
This lack of structure can create tension, especially if expectations weren’t clearly defined from the start.
4. Social Compatibility Isn’t Guaranteed
Even if the landlord seems friendly during the viewing, living together is a different story. You might discover:
They’re more controlling than they appeared.
Their habits clash with yours—noise, cleanliness, schedules, pets, etc.
They expect more social interaction than you’re comfortable with—or none at all.
Unlike choosing a roommate, you don’t get equal say in shaping the household dynamic.
5. You May Have Less Freedom in Your Own Home
Many landlords impose restrictions that wouldn’t exist in a standard rental, such as:
No guests or overnight visitors
Limited kitchen use
Curfews or “quiet hours” that suit their lifestyle
Restrictions on heating, laundry, or shared spaces
These rules can make you feel like you’re living in someone else’s space rather than your own home.
6. Conflicts Become Personal Very Quickly
In a normal rental, issues are handled professionally. When you live with the landlord:
Small annoyances can escalate because you see each other constantly.
There’s no buffer between personal and contractual disagreements.
You may feel pressure to avoid conflict entirely, even when something is unfair.
This can create a tense or uncomfortable atmosphere that affects your daily life.
7. Moving Out Can Be Awkward or Stressful
Ending the arrangement isn’t as simple as returning keys. You’re leaving someone’s home, and that can lead to:
Emotional reactions
Awkwardness during the notice period
Pressure to stay longer or leave sooner
Potential disputes over deposits or damages
The personal nature of the relationship can make the transition more complicated than it needs to be.
Final Thoughts
Living with a landlord can work for some people, especially if the landlord is respectful, boundaries are clear, and expectations are aligned. But for many renters, the loss of privacy, the unequal power dynamic, and the potential for conflict outweigh the financial benefits.
A home should be a place where you feel comfortable, autonomous, and free to live your life. When you share that space with the person who controls your tenancy, achieving that balance becomes much harder.
If you’re considering this type of rental, go in with your eyes open—and don’t underestimate the value of having a space that’s truly your own.
